The Breakfast Club is a major cultural touchstone that defined an era—the first honest portrayal of teens attempting to navigate their way through the hell of high school. But if you were one of the smarter fans, you knew not to look up to the characters as heroes. No, you saw it for the cautionary tale that it was.

Why won't Hillary just accept what we already know to be true: That Obama is the second coming. All she needs to do is lie down, go to sleep, and let his soothing, healing powers seep into her tormented soul to take effect. It'll be for the best.

It seems that John McCain might be a victim of friendly fire from within his own party. Roy Blunt, perhaps unintentionally, has made statements implying that McCain plans to continue George W.'s failed policies once he's in office. Last we heard, McCain is trying to shake the rotting albatross known as Bush from around his neck. Gotta stay on message, boys!

It's no real surprise that when culture warrior Bill O'Reilly was climbing the ranks of the broadcasting world, he did it with an iron fist and a dirty mouth. But that head of hair? Now that's a surprise.

You know you've hit it big when you're able to get grown men to dress their fingers in felt pants and parade around an urban dollhouse. Inspired by Sloane Crosley's book I Was Told There'd Be Cake.