Those OMONists are quite impressive; no duck would stand a chance...

Maybe those Russophobes you so enjoyed slagging had a point, after all.
Well, that's dialectics for you.
A word to the wise: this Christmas, dunk your presents underwater before opening them...

'Tis just as I foretold.
Honestly, what else did you expect? Whatever their other disagreements, all dictators are fundamentally humourless. As Chekhov (I think) said: "Even the fearless Tsar fears ridicule."
As with the libertines of Berlin circa January, 1933; the party's over, folks. Time to exit, stage left...