• He is risen: Just a day after his Wikipedia page announced his death, pre-Carrot Top punchline Sinbad announces he is indeed alive (his career vitals are still being checked).
• Golddigger cries wolf: Police have warned Heather Mills to stop making so many calls to 999, the Brit's version of 911.
• Beware the Stephen: Democratic caucus chairman Rahm Emanuel warns freshman congressman to stay away from the Report.