• Hocus pocus, rape-racadabra: Following allegations last week that he "forced himself" on a woman, David Copperfield canceled a series of upcoming shows in Southeast Asia.
• The Winehouse Combo Meal: Amy Winehouse is releasing a live DVD entitled I Told You I Was Trouble. But for you diehard alcoholic fans there's more: Upgrade now and for just 12 additional bucks you'll get the "Double Trouble Combo," complete with a pint glass and ashtray, .
• The fire this time: Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger declares a state of emergency as wildfires force the evacuations of nearly a quarter of a million people in Southern California.
• Start combing the white-girl weave: A freshly Botoxed Britney Spears was awarded supervised visitation rights after finally giving court-mandated drug testers her digits.
• Taxicab depression: New York City cabbies indulge in their newest annoying pastime: strike!