• Progressive parenting: Amy Winehouse's pops flips out on her smacky chum Pete Doherty, calling him a "scumbag" and allegedly clocking him with a guitar backstage at Brixton.
• Wither the turd blossom?: The book proposal by Karl Rove for a tome expected to garner a $3 million advance has stalled for a month.
• Deep Rush: Spinning off a Drudge report on Hillary Clinton's haggard looks, E.D. pill-gulping tubby Rush Limbaugh sounds off on our appearance-obsessed culture. If it's any consolation, Rush sounds like a bloated windbag, too.
• Advice from the blogfather: Hirsute proto-blogger Jorn Barger (the man who coined the term "weblog") offers his top 10 tips for bloggers. Our favorite: "Credit the source that led you to it, so your readers have the option of 'moving upstream.'" Also, it helps to not shave, ever.
• Tan and bones: Golden raisin Tara Reid pops up for a bikini shot. Finish breakfast first. Then gaze upon her wonder.