Platinum-selling, Lolita-dry-banging R&B bad boy Akon would like his fans to believe he's a Lamborghini-stealing hardened criminal who did a 4 1/2-year stretch for his master thievery. He's bragged in interviews about leading cops on high-speed chases or running chop shops servicing celebs and drug dealers. He'd still be doing it if it weren't for a bitchass bunch of snitches beneath him. Inside the joint, he was a legendary scrapper and once out, he celebrated his jailtime, naming his company Konvict Music and his second album Konvicted. But it's all fake, the Smoking Gun reports ...