• Prisoner abuse?: Pissed that Amy Winehouse is tramping around with other blokes, an incarcerated Blake Fielder-Civil is supposedly telling his lawyers he wants a $6 million divorce payout from his wayward wife. Sources tell UK's the Sun that Blake's also scouring the prison for heroin and has been put on suicide watch.
• Speak easy: Reverend Jeremiah Wright spoke at the National Press Club Monday, repudiating claims that his sermons made him unpatriotic. He told reporters that he'd prayed privately with the Obamas before Barack announced his candidacy, joking that he'd offer himself as a running mate.
• Second life of crime: Mexico has an exciting new crime craze: virtual kidnapping!
AND SO MUCH MORE: A dolphin death, Barbie is still bad, and name your poison!