• Gals today!: In Obama's defense, it actually said "Sweetie" on this newsbabe's T-shirt.
• And babies make six: Angelina Jolie confirms the world's worst-kept secret—she is pregnant with twins.
• Oil vs. bears: Move over Knut, Wilbaer, Flocke, and fetal Jolie twins! The Interior Department has adopted polar bears as a threatened species, a shocking Bush administration move that threatens all kinds of oil drilling.
• Everything Mold is new again: Atlantis Resorts in the Bahamas has re-recorded the Moldy Peaches' Juno fave "Anyone Else But You." Next up Chili's re-does "Steak for Chicken."
• Hova takes the "high" road: Several weeks after Oasis frontman/hasbeen Noel Gallagher took a swipe at Jay-Z's headliner slot at the Glastonbury music festival, Jay-Z responds with a classy diatribe about the progression of rap music and blah, blah, blah. Then the Sun credits him as a "former drug dealer."
• Adult Friend Finder works!: Remember Jake Bronstein, who was fired from the now-defunct FHM for saying vaguely derogatory things about Beth Ostrosky and later showed a bit too much of his junk? Well, he's moved on to classier pursuits, namely the "blagazine" Zoomdoggle, where one of his writers meets an f-buddy named "QuickNDirT" (and a gay 15-year-old boy) via ubiquitous porn ad, Adult Friend Finder.