• No gas relief: Remember that time George W. Bush and his oily Saudi buds kissed and held hands? That apparently did nothing for us—Saudi's refuse to produce more oil.
• Return of the Body?: An extremely suplexed-looking former governor/wrestler Jesse Venture announced he'd likely run against Republican incumbent Norm Coleman and Democratic funnyman Al Franken in Minnesota's U.S. Senate race. You know, Franken wrestled in high school.
• Time warning: Richard Parsons announced that he'll step down as president of Time Warner during the company's annual shareholder's meeting in Atlanta. Chief exec Jeff Bewkes is expected to take over. In honor of Parsons' departure, Time Warner will cut off your cable for an hour during your favorite show.
• Come Hill or high water: Even if Hillary Clinton won delegates in Florida and Michigan, she'd still have less than Barack Obama. Just sayin'.
• Love-36-24-40: The recently badonkadonked Serena Williams pulls out of the Italian open, citing a back problem. That's not a problem back there. That's an asset.