• Exeunt?: Ahead of tomorrow's South Dakota and Montana Democratic primaries, which Barack Obama is favored to win over Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton suggests it's his last day on the campaign trail for his wife.
• The balls and the Bee: The 81st annual Scripps National Spelling Bee, always a good source of unintentional hilarity, did not disappoint this year when 11-year-old Sameer Mishra was asked to spell numnah, which the announcer pronounced suspiciously like numbnut.
• Ashes to ashes: The ash remains of the late great Fredric J. Baur, designer of the iconic Pringles can, were placed in one of the tubular cans per his request. In less tasty news, someone has stolen the ashes of Kurt Cobain from his widow, Courtney Love, who now feels "suicidal."
• Denmark has pedophiles, too!: A Danish journalist posing as a 13-year-old girl online was solicited by over 100 pedophiles in a half-year period. The cream of the crop: Copenhagen's 53-year-old police chief.
• Delay of game: A judge has ruled that the parents of more than 400 children removed from a polygamist ranch run by Mormon child-lover Warren Jeffs must personally sign an agreement in order to collect their children from foster homes, which is quite an inconvenience for the mommies and daddies.
• Big shoes to fill: Anyone can rock a lame-ass Barack Obama '08 shirt, but true Obamaniacs sport these bangin' kicks, which Harriet Christian wouldn't be caught dead in.
• Thanks, doc: Massachusett's Senator Ted Kennedy's surgery for a brain tumor is said to have been a success.
• The monied class: From the fine folks who bring us This American Life, TruTV unveils a new crime show this Friday, Rich and Reckless, hosted by Radar contributor Mark Ebner. The show promises gore and greed. Okay, okay ... we're in.