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The Ecstasy of Defeat(continued)
(Photo: Getty Images) Alan Keyes '96 R, '00 R, '08 R
This wacky fundamentalist blowhard would probably be ranting on a street corner somewhere if he hadn't kept running for president. Laugh all you want, but do you rake in $15,000 every time you give a speech? Were you in Borat? 
(Photo: Getty Images) Pat Buchanan '92 R, '96 R, '00 I    
Your weird uncle's favorite crypto-facist sage knows that pie-in-the-sky presidential bids are the surest path to five-figure speaking gigs, a string of book deals, and a permanent slot on the cable news pundit circuit.
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