Radar Poll
Ask America!
Is the vice president on a highway to hell? Is George Bush less popular than Paris Hilton? With help from a D.C. polling firm, Radar's national survey asks the tough questions
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America loves a poll. We're always game for a deep statistical probing by Gallup, CNN, Family Feud—any excuse to discuss our secret hopes and fears with a stranger. But has there been one in the past 10 years that told us anything of real value? Did we really need a randomly selected sample of citizens to tell us that Tom Tancredo is unlikable? Or that four out of five dentists recommend sugarless gum to their patients who chew gum? Nearly 200 years after the advent of political bean-counting, the scientific survey is in desperate need of a makeover. So we at Radar decided to commission a national poll of our own—one that asked the questions we really wanted answered, impertinent though they might be. By throwing out all preconceived notions about demographics, electioneering, and propriety, we managed to create a survey unlike any other. And the results speak for themselves.
GIRL POWER
Who's more macho?
37% Clinton
30% Obama
18% Edwards
15% Other
When men face off for political office, it's difficult to suppress the (usually metaphorical) question of who's got the biggest dick; when there's a woman involved, the matter becomes a bit more complicated. But former British prime minister Margaret Thatcher proved that a female can win that contest. In our survey, Hillary managed the rare feat of uniting Democrats, Republicans, and Independents in one belief: She's got balls. Catholics seem awed by Obama's masculinity (35% choose him). Edwards's best demo is married men: 22% say he's muy macho.
Illustration by: John Kasch
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HATER NATION
He'll always have Paris
54% Hate him
67% Hate her
In early 2002, only 13% of Americans "hated" George W. Bush. For various reasons too depressing and voluminous to recount here, the president is now more loathed than a chimp at a creationist convention. There is, however, at least one fellow citizen we deplore in similarly large numbers...
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BURNING QUESTION
Is Dick Cheney going to heaven or hell?
Hell: 55%
Purgatory: 4%
Heaven: 38%
Among people willing to speculate on the fate of Dick Cheney's soul, a majority believe "The Angler" is destined to spend eternity on a lake of fire. There is some disagreement though: While 71% of Democrats think he's hell-bound, only 22% of Republicans do (75% of them believe he's going to heaven); 58% of Catholics, but only 45% of Protestants, are betting Hades; 67% of people who never attend church consign him to damnation, but just 39% of weekly worshipers do. The most unforgiving demographic? Those with a taste for online porn—by a six-to-one margin, they think he's toast.
Illustration by: John Kasch
| This is an excerpt from the November issue of Radar Magazine. For a risk-free issue, click here. |
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TRUTH AND CONSEQUENCES
Is it ever okay for the president to lie to the American people?
71% No
24% Yes
5% Other
Lies happen in any presidency, whatever your definition of "happen" happens to be. But who thinks First Fibbing is sometimes acceptable? 33% of gun owners say there's a time and place for presidential untruths, while only 16% of Oprah viewers do. And curiously, getting hitched seems to change men's minds on the matter: Only 15% of single guys think lying is excusable; among married men, the figure soars to 35%.
Is it ever okay for a candidate to do so?
76% No
21% Yes
3% Other
Republicans are particularly open to idea of deceit in an election: 28% are okay with it. (By contrast, only 15% of Independents and 20% of Dems are.)
This poll, conducted for Radar magazine by On Target Research, surveyed 603 adults nationwide over the telephone between August 18 and August 21, 2007. The margin of error is +/- 4%.
| This is an excerpt from the November issue of Radar Magazine. For a risk-free issue, click here. |
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CONSPIRACY LEERY
Did the U.S. government know about the 9/11 attacks before they happened?
36% Yes
49% No
15% Other
INTRODUCING: The 9/11 Skeptic
Despite their fringe status, 9/11 Skeptics are more numerous in this country than Republicans. 44% of 18- to 44-year-olds are Skeptics, as are 50% of single men, 50% of non-whites, 41% of Midwesterners, and 48% of people whose education ended with high school. They're strongly Democratic (46% of Dems answered "yes" to this question), but less likely to vote than non-Skeptics.
WOOING STRATEGY: To win over this alienated demo, a candidate should make frequent, vague statements about not being afraid of the "Truth." Also suggested: photo ops with Charlie Sheen and Rosie O'Donnell.
Related: Radar Poll
