CALIFORNIA
1. Gold Rush
No wonder they call it the Gold Coast: San Jose stakes claim to the highest concentration of women digging men who make more than $150,000 per year.
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2. Cougar COUNTRY
Madera hosts the highest percentage of men under 25 seeking women over 50. They say you can smell the Chanel N°5 for miles.
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3. Fat Chance
Packing on some pounds? Make a run for the border: El Centro weighs in with the highest percentage of men seeking "big and beautiful" women—and the highest percentage of women seeking "big and beautiful" men.
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4. Boys Town
El Centro also has the highest percentage of men seeking men in the country.
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5. No Hairs-Ville
No, Captain Picard, this isn't the Holo-deck. Women in Napa are the most likely to be turned on by bald men.
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COLORADO
6. Mountains of Bush
Fast-clicking Coloradoans rent more porn online per capita than any other state.
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FLORIDA
7. Desperately Seeking Sunni
Miami has the highest percentage of Jewish singles seeking Muslims in the country.
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GEORGIA
8. Eat a Peach
The greater Hinesville metro area has the highest concentration of women seeking women in the country.
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IDAHO
9. GUNS AND AMORE
Lewiston (on the Washington border) has the highest percentage of women seeking partners interested in hunting and fishing.
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10. GIRTHQUAKE
Idaho buys the most vibrating erection rings per capita of any state in the continental U.S.
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ILLINOIS
11. A Romantic Dip
The gentlemen of Danville top the list of those open to women who use smokeless tobacco—pucker up.
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INDIANA
12. Hoosier Daddy
Note to Jeffrey Epstein: Forget Palm Beach. Columbus, Indiana, has the highest concentration of women under 25 seeking men over 50.
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IOWA
13. Little Man on the Prairie
Dubuque is home to the highest concentration of women looking for men their height or shorter.
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14. If There's Hay on the Field ...
Iowa and South Carolina are tied for the lowest Age of Consent in the United States (14 years old).
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KANSAS
15. Bored of Ed
Kansas rents the most educational porn of any state in the country.
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NEVADA
16. CAESAR'S PHALLUS
Sin City has the highest percentage of singles turned on by erotica in the country, thanks mostly to the Adult Video News Awards and godlessness.
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NEW JERSEY
17. Tunnel Traffic
Garden State residents rent more heterosexual, anal-centric porn than any other state in the union.
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NEW YORK
18. NO PORK on the first date
Albany has the highest percentage of Muslim singles seeking Jews in the country.
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19. City Slickers
New York buys more lube than any other city in the country.
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North Carolina
20. Tit for Tat
Fayetteville has the highest percentage of singles turned on by tattoos.
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NORTH DAKOTA
21. Butte Is Skin Deep
Perhaps due only to its proximity to Canada, the state is home to America's ugliest men.
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OHIO
22. Holy Toledo
Ohio rents the least porn per capita in the U.S.
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OREGON
23. The Beaver State
Oregon rents the highest percentage of Hentai, or pornographic cartoons, of any state in the union.
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PENNSYLVANIA
24. The Pelt Belt
Transcending the nationwide scope of the Radar map of love, Pittsburgh proudly lays claim to Anthrocon—at 2,500 strong, the largest convention of animal-suit-wearing fetishists the world over.
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SOUTH CAROLINA
25. Down in Dixie
South Carolina has the highest percentage of female porn enthusiasts in the country.
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26. Sugar TOOTH
Sumter has the highest percentage of men seeking women who make over $150,000 per year.
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27. If There's Hay on the Field ...
South Carolina and Iowa and are tied for the lowest Age of Consent in the United States (14 years old).
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TEXAS
28. The Coming Rapture
The randy singles of Sherman-Denison are most likely to name Left Behind,a novel about the apocalypse, as their favorite book.
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29.Wrongview
The citizens of Longview are the most likely to be turned on by public displays of affection.
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WASHINGTON
30. Small Wonder
Washington rents more midget porn per capita than any other state in the union.
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31. Wimps Up, Hos Down
Bremerton-Silverdale has the highest percentage of women seeking "slender" men.
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Washington, D.C.
32. Closed-Door Sessions
Washington, D.C., buys the most discreet vibrators (i.e., sex toys disguised as lipstick, nail polish, or rubber ducks) of any other state.
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WYOMING
33. Ride 'em Cowboys
Ang Lee was right. Wyoming rents the highest per capita percentage of gay porn in the country.
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34. Jolly Ranchers
Casper is home to the highest percentage of singles turned on by skinny-dipping.
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