America's scandalous weathermen

It's Hurricane season. And you know that means: plenty of breaking reports about gale-force winds, record rainfall, and the incredible destruction wreacked by storms like Hanna, Ike, and Josephine.

But what about the proud (and sometimes gay-seeming) men and women charting these global warming–induced weather patterns? They appear every 10 minutes, they seem to care about whether your house gets plowed by a tornado, and they have great hair. But are their personal lives all clear skies and sunshine?

The answer, quite clearly, is no. Sure, standing in front of a green screen predicting another "Hot One!" in Florida doesn't look all that difficult. But for some TV soothsayers, there's one weather pattern they can't predict: a shitstorm off the set.

Below, your guide to a few of the great weather scandals of the oughts.

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SEXUAL HARASSMENT
This year saw a rather messy brouhaha at the Georgia-based Weather Channel, with a scandal centered on sexual harassment and the subsequent cover-up. According to documents on the Smoking Gun, 38-year-old meteorologist Hillary Andrews is suing the station and her former co-anchor, 50-year-old Bob Stokes. (We can't resist asking: Are all Hillarys this frigid?)

The two were paired on a popular(?) prime-time program from 2003 to 2006, during which time Stokes became "romantically obsessed" with Andrews. He literally said, "Will you lick my swizzle stick?" and "leered at her chest." When Stokes was rebuffed, he began calculated acts of sabotage, like reading her lines on air. Despite fear of being moved to the overnight shift—like one predecessor who'd complained—Andrews spoke up. She says the Weather Channel honchos ignored her because Stokes gets big ratings(??).

On January 31 of this year, Andrews won an arbitration that blasted the Weather Channel and Bob Stokes. On February 1, Stokes was sacked. Now you're caught up.

Andrews has retained a lawyer for her civil case against Stokes, who has apparently internalized the prevailing wunderkind literary style of the day: "Throughout this period, Stokes directed hostile conduct at her on an almost daily basis. He yelled. He bullied. He became irate." But did he have a point when he said to her: "Come on, just tell me. If I asked you out and wasn't working in TV and I was very successful on Wall Street, you would go out with me, right? I know you would. I know you would."