Secrets for success in the Playboy empire

Hugh Hefner, 82, has created an erotic empire based around the famous Playboy lifestyle and a little bunny with a bow tie. Some may call the magazine's softly lit pictorials of curvaceous women sprawled out in sexy positions porn. Hefner calls it erotica.

Hef, as he likes to be called, has never been ashamed to be known as a womanizing party animal, a man who proudly lounges in silk robes with nothing underneath. In fact, although he is living with his three girlfriends—Holly, Bridget, and Kendra—he never actually divorced his last wife, former playmate Kimberly Conrad. He separated from Conrad in 1999 after the pair had two sons.

Hef is like any normal hot-blooded American who likes pretty ladies: He took a wife or two, has four kids, and lives in a Tudor-style mansion with luscious lawns and a personal zoo. Sounds like any old family man, right? Except this doting dad kicked his son out and boxed up his room when he turned 18 because he was afraid he would sleep with the Playmates. You don't do Daddy's ladies—house rules.

Hef may be a territorial man's man, but he's actually calmed down in his old age. His harem, which used to number seven women, has dwindled to three—all stars of E! reality series The Girls Next Door, which debuts its fifth season next week.

HELLO NEIGHBOR A scene from E!'s The Girls Next Door

The show, which focuses on the day-to-day adventures of Hef's three lady friends, is a lighthearted look at life in the famous manse. Still, off camera, not everything is smooth as a Playmate's airbrushed naughty bits. Recently, rumors have emerged that both Holly and Kendra are involved in other relationships. (And Bridget is still technically married!) Though Hefner maintains that Holly "shares his bed nightly," rumors of his company's possible bankruptcy may send some of the more opportunistic bunnies scattering and leave room for one more in Hef's legendary rotation.

So how can you get noticed and optimize your chances for breaking into Hef's world? A source and former employee of the magazine divulged the salacious situations that no one gets to hear or see unless they are a fly on those famous Playboy walls. Here's your step-by-step guide to success.