Radar salutes Hollywood's creepiest father figures

On Father's Day, we're inclined to celebrate the Paul Simons of the world, whose cheeky ballad to daughters everywhere touched our hearts. But what about other kinds of dads, dads who perhaps sing their daughter's praises ... a little too loudly?

Below, Radar presents those well-known dads who take filial pride to the next level, and manage to stand behind their daughters while completely creeping us out.

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JOE SIMPSON
Some girls get sheepish when their dads talk about their periods, boyfriends, or accidental walk-ins, but when your dad is Joe Simpson and he goes to GQ talking about your jubblies, it can affect your sanity—and your career. The quote, in case you're the last person on earth to hear it: "Jessica never tries to be sexy. She just is sexy. If you put her in a T-shirt or you put her in a bustier, she's sexy in both. She's got DOUBLE Ds! You can't cover those suckers up!"

Oh, Joe, how do you manage it all? Leveraging those aforementioned pair, you go from being a Baptist minister to a third wheel in your daughter's marriage. When Jessica was newly wed to Nick Lachey, Joe was a staple in their MTV-funded mansion.

To make matters worse, Joe reportedly asked Jessica's Dallas Cowboys boy toy Tony Romo to release his agent and allow him to manage him (and his $67.5 million contract), despite the fact that the couple wasn't married and Jessica's romantic prospects have never been long-lasting. When asked about his controlling ways, Joe snapped, "It's unfair to criticize me for what every manager does for his or her clients. And in this business, where people can quickly turn on you, who better than a parent to be working for his children?" Keepin' it all in the family!