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The Internet Is for Scorn(continued)
The transition of Page from cretinous but anonymous asshat to Worst Person in the World" is a case study in the perils of Internet dating, particularly if you are a self-absorbed blowhard with little sense of humor and less tact. The oafish Page, a balding Penn graduate from Atlanta, responded to a girl who "winked" at him on match.com by asking inquiring about her fitness regimen and asking for full-body pictures. When she reasonably decided that he was totally creepy and declined, he let her have it: "You hit on me, and therefore have to impress ME and pass MY criteria and standards—not vice versa. 6 pictures of just your head and your inability to answer a simple question lets me know one thing. You are not in shape. I am a trainer on the side, in fact, I am heading to the gym in 26 minutes! So next time you meet a guy of my caliber, instead of trying to turn it around, just get to the gym! I will even give you one free training session, so you don't blow it with the next 8.9 on Hot or Not, Ivy League grad, Mensa member, can bench/squat/leg press over 1200 lbs., has had lunch with the secretary of defense, has an MBA from the top school in the country, lives in a Buckhead high rise, drives a Beemer convertible, has been in 14 major motion pictures, was in Jezebel's Best dressed, etc. Oh, that is right, there aren't any more of those!" In a shrewd bit of payback, the scorned online dater sent Page's response to Gawker, which immediately posted the correspondence under the headline, "The Worst Person in the World." (The post generated an astounding 2,028 comments.) Everyone from CNN to the CBS Early Show followed suit—Fark actually had to shut down its forum page on Fitzgerald, it got so long—and thus the next Aleksey Vayner was born. Page's attempts to convert his worst-person status into commercial success have fizzled, unless you count such endeavors as his recent guest appearance on an episode of Dr. Phil titled "Male Egos: Out of Control." He won't give up, though: Over at Esquire, you can vote for Page in the magazine's annual "Best Dressed Real Man" contest. He describes his personal style as "Gordon Gecko + James Bond + Italian designers." Unfortunately, he's not kidding. 
You know you've struck a nerve with the Internet masses when your saga has been covered breathlessly by media outlets big and small, yet the first Google hit involving your name is titled "People You'll See in Hell." But that's what happens when you're an adult who maybe drove an adolescent girl to suicide. A fantastic account of the whole sordid mess can be found in the New Yorker, but for the uninitiated, the story goes something like this: A 13-year-old girl named Meghan Meier hung herself in the upstairs closet of her suburban Missouri home after receiving a bunch of nasty MySpace messages from a boy she had been corresponding with. Except the boy in question, "Josh Evans," wasn't actually a boy: He was the fictional creation of a woman named Lori Drew, the mother of a girl with whom young Meier had once been friends. Meghan and the friend had a falling out, as adolescent girls are wont to do, which prompted the girl's mom to punish Meghan by "friending" her as a 16-year-old hottie named "Josh Evans." Seemingly, Drew planned on toying with Meghan's emotions to teach her some sort of life lesson, failing to realize that 13-year-old girls are fragile creatures who don't take well to that style of teaching. Granted, it later came out that Drew knew Meghan had battled depression, making her cold "This isn't my fault and I had no idea this would happen" defense ring somewhat hollow. (To make matters worse, she even enlisted the help of another young girl to make the ruse more plausible.) Interestingly enough, the St. Charles Journal, the paper that originally broke the story, didn't mention Drew by name, but a bunch of pissed-off bloggers eventually outed her. Drew hasn't yet been charged with a crime, but prosecutors are looking to see if her creating the fake MySpace account can be grounds for fraud. In the interim, congratulations, Lori! You are officially the most despised person in the whole wide web! READ MORE • Digby Goes Down: YouTube sensation Marié Digby was riding high until the Wall Street Journal tried to shut her down • No Country for Fat Chicks: Radar rounds up the decade's most misogynistic movies • Today's Top Stories 
Julia Allison is "imminently quotable" - any second now she's going to say something smart... Posted by: matthew on April 8, 2008 1:40 PM I hate that cunt rachel ray with all my rage. No tits, fat ass, and sucky laugh. please die slowly Posted by: nana on April 8, 2008 5:17 PM @nana: Rachael Ray has tits. Posted by: moneycashhos on April 8, 2008 5:27 PM 11. Barry Diller 109. Amanda Congdon 1,3445. That girl from my 5th grade English class who never confirmed my Facebook request. Posted by: twitter on April 8, 2008 6:06 PM Advertisement Rachel Ray is a babe! And to the writer who said" "smokey cumin" grates on her nerve needs to seriously get a life. I mean really there are a few more important things to be angry about, doncha think? Posted by: Dr Doug on April 8, 2008 8:01 PM Damn, Rachael Ray? Okay, so people don't like "perky," I get that. So DON'T WATCH. Losers. You guys forgot two people, though: Tom Cruise and his bucket of crazy. Too obvious? How was he missed? Jackie Mackie Paisley Passey, of "I only date quality men" infamy is at least a good runner-up for the list. The twat deleted the post eventually, but she can't hide from the wayback machine! Hilarious commentary on it: http://minx.cc/?post=193209 Posted by: BethC on April 8, 2008 8:51 PM Markos "kos" Zuniga also said "Screw Them" about the 4 dead American workers in Iraq: Here it is: http://michellemalkin.com/2005/04/01/screw-them-not-a-joke/ "Left-wing blogger and Democratic strategist Markos Moulitsos Zuniga of the Daily Kos cheered the brutal murders of four American civilian contractors in Fallujah-all of them war veterans with distinguished records, three of them fathers." Posted by: quickrob on April 9, 2008 5:44 PM Wow! That Atlanta guy's a cunt. What about Tyler Max, though? A little old school, but he is the absolute emperor of douchebags. Posted by: Cookie on April 10, 2008 12:51 AM Tila Tequila is such a loser. I know people who know her. She is NO BISEXUAL!! She did it to try and become famous, because her music sucks a**!!! Isn't it funny that before a shot at love was even over...they had auditions for a shot at love 2. She is hilarious. Not to mention all the plastic surgery she has had! Looking good though for a short girl who used to be really fat!!! She also does not know how to act! Talk about the most annoying voice ever! And, to start her friends list she told people that she whore trained herself a million times to get as many friends as she has. Anyone can do that. Get a life Tila...and your name isn't even Tila. HAHAHA Posted by: scoref67 on May 7, 2008 11:51 AM Tila Tequila is such a loser. I know people who know her. She is NO BISEXUAL!! She did it to try and become famous, because her music sucks a**!!! Isn't it funny that before a shot at love was even over...they had auditions for a shot at love 2. She is hilarious. Not to mention all the plastic surgery she has had! Looking good though for a short girl who used to be really fat!!! She also does not know how to act! Talk about the most annoying voice ever! And, to start her friends list she told people that she whore trained herself a million times to get as many friends as she has. Anyone can do that. Get a life Tila...and your name isn't even Tila. HAHAHA Posted by: scoref67 on May 7, 2008 11:58 AM Post a commentYour comment will not be visible for about a minute. If you don't see your comment when the page reloads, do not post it again. Reload the page in a minute, and you'll see it. < BACK TO Features |
    
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