BARON OF ALL PIMPS Philippino brothel magnate Anthony Moynihan
According to one obituary of Baron Moynihan, "The most remarkable thing about his life is how he managed to avoid spending most of it in prison." Baron Moynihan started his life on the lam when he fled British bobbies and his nude model wife to evade an assault rap. He worked then as bongo player in Australia but ultimately found a more lucrative gig operating a chain of brothels in the Philippines. There he kept a grenade launcher in the trunk of his car and reportedly ducked a murder charge thanks to his close relationship with Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos. After the Marcos's were thrown from office, he escaped prosecution for a plot to build a massive marijuana plantation by squealing on his partner.
Moynihan eventually became married to his fourth and fifth wives at the same time; an unseemly scandal erupted after his death over who was the rightful heir to his lordship. Testimony about the late lords low sperm count knocked his children out of contention, and the lordship was given to the Moynihan's half-brother, the current head of the British Olympic Association.
YOU LUCAN AT ME? Wife-beating degenerate gambler and accidental nanny slayer Lord Lucan
Lord Lucan appeared to be the epitome of an upright British aristocrat, what with his family home in Westminster, regal bearing, and sexy mustache. The dashing fellow also had a taste for speed boats and gambling, and after a particularly successful run in the casinos gained him both a sizable sum and the nickname "Lucky," he dropped his other career pursuits to become a professional gambler. He ended up having a rough go of it and eventually found himself living the life of a drunken, debt-ridden, wife-beating gambler. Perhaps in an effort to reduce his expenses and secure sole custody of his children, he hatched a plot to kill his mentally fragile wife. But Lucky Lord Lucan, a direct descendant of the man responsible for the famously doomed "Charge of the Light Brigade" somehow botched the job, brutally killing his children's nanny instead of his wife. Lucan has not been seen since that night in 1974, and his whereabouts remains the subject of much speculation.
Photos, in order of apearance: Keystone/Hulton Archive/Getty Images; Douglas Miller/Keystone/Getty Images
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