OH YOUR EDITOR CAN WAIT, BLOGGER! RELAX Rubbing one out at Google's DNC HQ (Photo: Getty Images)

Screw party politics, governmental gambits, and the wonk-ish waffling that happens behind closed doors: the Democratic National Convention in Denver is proving that the most effective way to advance democratic principles is through equal opportunity ... junketeerism!

For reporters, free stuff abounds (That's why we're called "free"-lance. Duh.). Here in Denver, we're treated to an endless flow of continental breakfasts, finger foods, buffets, catered lunches, snack breaks, full-blown Colorado lamb dinners, "receptions" (read: free booze, one step above Natty Light, and boxed wine), "V.I.P. receptions" (two steps above Natty Light and boxed wine), and "late night parties" involving all of the above.

It's all very welcome, if a tad unseemly.

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