• Seed of Mikey?: Michael Lohan, father of Lindsay, took a paternity test Monday to find out if he's the father of a 13-year-old girl in Montana claiming to be his. According the Post, the teen has freckles and "Michael's eyes," but Papa Lohan doesn't think it's his. "If the test is found to be negative she's gonna be sued for libel and defamation," he said of the girl's mother, a massage therapist he cuddled with in the mid-90s when he was separated from "Top Mom," Dina Lohan.

• Developing: Arrested Development's Jeffrey Tambor says a movie of the beloved series is looking like a sure thing. "After months of speculation," he says "I think we have finally figured out for sure that we are indeed doing an Arrested Development movie."

Sound and fury: Did Obama supporter Wes Clark impugn John McCain's military service? Of course not. But you wouldn't know that by listening to press reaction.

SURE, THERE'S MORE: WMD madness!; skinny dipping; eBay taken to the bank; and low impact rockin'!

• Bomb's away: A former CIA operative says the agency deliberately suppressed findings that Iran had stopped work on a nuclear bomb. The man's lawyer says that "On five occasions he was ordered to either falsify his reporting on WMD in the Near East, or not to file his reports at all."

• In hot water: Two young skinny dippers caught in a Portland reservoir nearly necessitated that city officials dump millions of gallons of potentially contaminated water.

• Bargain backlash: A French court has ordered eBay to pay $60.8 million to luxury goods company LVMH saying the online auction site isn't working hard enough to prevent the sale of counterfeit Louis Vuitton bags and other shit integral to the plot of the Sex and City movie.

• Lucky stars: Thank God has-been musicians can now cash-in with Guitar Hero deals and pay for bitches, blow, rehab, and rising AARP membership fees.

• If that's your thing: The 49-city "American Idols Lives!" tour starts today in Glendale, Arizona.

• No joking: In what could be a landmark legal case, or just the first Facebook defamation case in the UK, a man is suing an old friend for making a fake profile of him that falsely stated his sexual orientation and political views.