SELF-LOVE WILL TEAR THEM APART Cook, Brinkley (Photo: Getty Images)

As the Christie Brinkley-Peter Cook divorce proceedings get ever messier, a court-appointed expert witness, Dr. Stephen Herman, explained Tuesday just why Cook fell into the arms of 18-year-old Diana Bianchi. In his testimony before the court, the good doctor diagnosed Cook with narcissism, saying the affliction had led the poor man to lead a "triple life"—one with Brinkley, one with Bianchi, and one with some pricey Internet porn.

In 2006, Cook was caught having an affair with the then 18-year-old Hamptons high schooler Bianchi, which sort of put a damper (as teen sex often will) on his 10-year-marriage to the woman best known as a former American Sweetheart/Mrs. Billy Joel/your junior-high beat-off material.

Thank God we finally have the medical knowledge to explain such behavior.

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