Kanye West has achieved the impossible! He's made us not want to drink vodka. Hip-hop's biggest ego is appearing in a viral ad campaign for Absolut vodka that may cause nausea before you take your first sip of the mediocre brand of potato juice.

The "Be Kanye" spot features West, a blonde chick, and a schlubby white dude pretending to be in a cheesy infomercial for a "Be Kanye" tablet that lets you experience Kanye's magical superstar powers. If you call 1-877-BE-KANYE or go to www.bekanyenow.com, it turns out, it's all fake! Surprise! There are no special Kanye tablets, just a cheesy, trying-too-hard-to-be-hip marketing scheme. Kanye is no stranger to shilling, his current tour is sponsored by Absolut and he's designing a shoe line for Louis Vuitton, but this spot is a new low.

First, it's for Absolut vodka, a boring middle-brow concoction that neither tastes that good nor is the sort of drunken late-night money-saver to turn to after you've blown all your cash on something delicious, no matter what Chris Hitchens says.

Even more importantly, the spot is just incredibly cheesy—in that awful, distasteful way marketing execs aim for "viral" and "lo fi," all the while spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to achieve it. And it all sort of goes against what we (secretly) love about big hip-hop personas: the bling. If you're going to shill out, do it big. Make them hire Annie Leibowitz to shoot you sipping that shit on your yacht, or else go to South Beach and shoot something with fancy camera moves. Even Diddy had the good sense to do that with his vodka commercial for Ciroc.