Madonna's brother, Chris Ciccone, took to Good Morning America today to discuss Madge and Alex Rodriguez (not boning; she's Catholic, after all), Kabbalah (he was blackmailed into practicing it), that homophobe sister-stealer Guy Ritchie (hates him), and loads of other maybe-vindictive tidbits we can expect in his forthcoming book, Life With My Sister Madonna. It's all a little dirty, so you know—even the parts that aren't.