ONE OF THESE IS PROBABLY WHITNEY I mean, right?

Hills star Lauren Conrad could barely disguise her contempt (masked beneath a slew of exclamation points, but still!) after finding out that her sweet but dim-witted and bothersome ex-housemate Audrina Patridge had landed a role in an actual Hollywood film. God knows how she'll take the news that her undermining co-worker, blond cherub Whitney Port, has landed her own MTV spin-off.

According to Us Weekly, the show will chronicle Port as she becomes "bicoastal while working for fashion PR firm People's Revolution—and befriends a group of NYC gals (including socialite Olivia Palermo)." An "insider" tells the mag, "There will be more blondes in the city than you ever expected!" Wonder if that "insider" is a "publicist" at MTV!

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