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The Hills Season Finale: Can These Gals Ever Love Each Other Again?

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"YOU'RE WEARING TOO MUCH FOUNDATION." "YEAH, SAME." AP, LC (Photo: Getty Images)
Dear Hills creator Adam Divello,

Well, I guess this is where we part, old friend—until August, at least, when another season begins. Can I just say that this was sort of a weird ending? First, there was Lauren's super long opening voiceover thing—I bet she didn't like it one bit to have to devote so much time to Heidi's little life. And then there was that extended section about how her and Audrina are growing apart—she's not really that dumb, is she? It's so obvious she's neglected Audrina for Lo and whenever they try to fix it, it's totally fake and forced. Plus, Audrina's a brunette, which is awkward. And besides, three girls living together always gets messy. Someone always gets left out, and typically, it is the girl who is getting laid.

Lo's evil and manipulative powers are growing. You can tell she's been in a sorority, Kappa Kappa Gamma no less. I'm beginning to wonder if bringing her on the show was really the best idea. And what about their new dog? We barely saw it last night. Is it going to come back next season? If not, I am interested in adopting it.

The Heidi/Spencer thing was kind of a disappointment, too. Heidi has been trying hard to look very professional, wearing pencil skirts and vaguely concealing her silicone, and I think Sam was really starting to like her. I, for one, found her a total inspiration. And then Spencer shows up, and she doesn't even bother to let Brent know she's bailing! As much as I think Brent and Sam wanted a cute little piece of tail around to "manage" the "project," I think they both knew Heidi wouldn't be able to stay on the no-Spencer wagon for long. We all did, really. It was like Lauren not going to Paris all over again. But hey, at that point Jason had rented a beach house in Malibu for the summer, so I was like, okay, I get it. But Heidi and Spencer just go back to their apartment, maybe to discuss the fate of Spencer's big fish tank. I could have used a little more.

But back to Lauren and Audrina. Here's the thing, Adam, and I really think you should all think about it for next season. I just don't buy Lauren as sweet and clueless anymore, which makes her opening voiceover increasingly disingenuous. And another thing, I didn't like it when she told Whitney that she and Audrina wouldn't have anything in common if they didn't live together. This is so not true; as Heidi so wisely said earlier this year, "all girls share a love for fashion." Whatever. On the preview for next season, it was nice to see that Audrina appears to get a backbone, though I don't think she'll really move out. She was looking at a loft in downtown Los Angeles. That's really far from Hollywood. Maybe she should just go back to that villa place with the pool? That seemed more her style. And anyway, I don't think it'd be safe for Justin Bobby to park his motorcycle overnight downtown.

Until August, have a great summer! In the absence of your Hills gals, I'm forced to try and have a lame little life of my own. Wish me luck!

Always,
Radar

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