By now, even devout readers of TMZ have grown weary of the media circus surrounding the sad, sad story of Britney Spears' battle with ex-husband Kevin Federline for custody over their two kids. But one man, Mark Vincent Kaplan, actually revels in the madness, and not because he takes pleasure in fiddling like Nero as Rome burns around him. Kaplan, you see, is Federline's attorney, and all the press coverage has the unintended but welcome effect of saving him lots and lots of money! "If I had to hire an investigator or investigators to provide me with the intelligence about what's going on, where they are, how are they doing," he tells the Associated Press, "it would be north of half a million to a million dollars ... as opposed to buying People magazine for $3.95 on Thursday morning or going on TMZ."

Of course, it's not only bargain-basement lawyering that concerns him.

Kaplan, who goes way back with Federline (he drafted his prenup), also credits the media with changing public perception of his client from gold-digging louche to gold-digging louche who may actually be more responsible than Britney Spears. "The mission involved—wanting to change the wrongful impression that was generally perceived for my client—without the media being a willing participant, it would have been impossible," he claims, adding rather hilariously that the custody battle has taken him "right through the center of the American dream."

Federline still owes Kaplan $343,834 for services rendered, but he's not in it for the money. He's in it for the children. "The bottom line is you've got two kids ... who don't know and don't care and should never have to care about who their parents are," he says. "They just want to be safe and secure, nurtured and bonded with their parents just like any other kids. That's really what's at the core of this just like any other case."

He makes a fair point—there are kids involved, and they certainly didn't ask to be popped out of Britney's uterus—but Kaplan loses us with his boast that very few lawyers "have the (guts) to go for the opportunity" he is currently seizing. Though we supposed repping K-Fed is slightly more noble than taking on the plight of Jennifer Lopez's second husband, Chris Judd.