• Too cool to be forgotten: Democratic senator, Foreign Relations Committee chair, and Obama VP contender Joe Biden takes aim in a WSJ op-ed. "Mr. Bush has turned a small number of radical groups that hate America into a 10-foot tall existential monster that dictates every move we make," Biden writes, "The Bush-McCain saber rattling is the most self-defeating policy imaginable. It achieves nothing. But it forces Iranians who despise the regime to rally behind their leaders."

• Tranny, ho!: Denise Richards responds to Charlie Sheen' allegations that she wrote an e-mail asking for some sperm after they broke-up. "I don't want Charlie's prostitute-tranny-infested sperm," says Richards. And just when we're getting sick of typing about these two!

• Desperate woman: New York governor and Democratic super-delegate David Paterson says Hillary Clinton is showing signs of "desperation." Bill Clinton is said to be pushing pretty hard for a consolation prize that starts with a V and ends with a P.

SURE, THERE'S MORE: A dude has lots of sex with lots of cars!; Oasis vs. Coldplay; and Rev. rejected by McCain!

• Battle of the bands: Are Chris Martin and Coldplay trying too hard to break a record for the fastest-selling album in Britain, long held by Oasis? Apparently, some Oasis people think so. No one else really cares.

• Tail Pipin': A Washington man who claims to have had sex with 1,000 cars says he's just a (hopeless) romantic. "I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change."

• Rejected: John McCain has rejected the endorsement of crazy-talkin' (Hitler, hunting Jews, that sort of thing) Rev. John Hagee, saying he was never as tight with his controversial minister as Obama was with that crazy Rev. Jeremiah Wright.

• Accepting on her beehive: Amy Winehouse won a prestigious Ivor Novello award for songwriting Thursday but was too busy dealing with her demons to pick up her trophy. Wino's father accepted the award on her behalf and "forgot" to mention her husband Blake in his acceptance speech.

• Father knows better?: Michael Lohan has filed papers to reopen his divorce to "top mom" Dina Lohan. He wants more time with the kids.

• Danger zone?: The Texas Court of Appeals has ruled that the state had no right to remove more than 400 children from a polygamist sect, saying the kids were in no immediate danger, save for bad fashion.