In our April Scientology cover story, we noted that the recent increase in Internet-based attacks on Scientology has led Church elders to up recruitment efforts in "communities less likely to have Web access," such as Central America and predominately black neighborhoods like Harlem. Judging by the Church's recent acquisition of a 64,000-square-foot castle in Johannesburg, you can now officially add South Africa to the list.

Kyalami Castle, as it is called, is situated on 22-acre parcel of land just outside Jo-berg city limits; before it became the epicenter of the Church's efforts to expand its quasi-religious reach over the Dark Continent, it was a hotel-cum-banquet hall. It marks the 66th building the Church has purchased internationally in the past five years—as good an indication as any that most Americans have finally decided that parting ways with tens of thousands of dollars for some dubious shot at spiritual enlightenment probably isn't the most efficient use of money.

"For all African Scientologists, this is a dream finally come true," a Church official said of the purchase. "It means a lot for the future expansion of the Church in Africa." Talk about your White Man's Burden.