When we last left off, Britney Spears had made a cameo appearance at the courthouse where custody hearings were taking place, but she was too scared to go inside.

However, she wasn't scared to go inside a shopping mall, with rumors now surfacing about some dirty dressing room antics Brit Brit engaged in the day before she skipped out on the hearing. Girlfriend was supposedly shopping at the Betsey Johnson store at the Westfield Fashion Square in Sherman Oaks (note: frequenting malls in the Valley is never a good sign) and came out of the dressing room completely naked at one point. "I was blown away. Britney's private parts were right in front of me!" a store employee told Life & Style.

Are Britney's private parts really that shocking at this point? Supposedly, the pop tart and boy toy Adnan Ghalib then disappeared into the fitting room stall for 45 minutes to get busy. Weird noises emanated from their little love shack. As much as we want to believe this lovely tale, and despite the journalistic giants that reported it, it seems a little too perfect. All that's missing is a bloody, semen-filled condom left at the scene.

In other news, Britney and Adnan went to a deli. Yes, it's true! See the riveting video footage here. It looks as though bagels might have come into play at one point.

And, never one to be outdone by that Dr. Phil character, Rosie O'Donnell has weighed in on the situation, comparing Britney and her papa-stalkers to the late Princess Diana and her camera-wielding death crew.

Also, Brit is affecting a British accent.

US Weekly cock-blocks In Touch's chance for the Pulitzer in Britney reportage, saying that the baby tabloid's claim of a prehospitalization suicide note penned by the pop tart was false.

And, finally, attention-starved K-Fed started his three-episode stint on One Tree Hill last night. We weren't strong enough to watch (the promos were all we needed). If you were ... do tell.