The always plucky Mary-Kate Olsen spoke to Nylon for their December issue while promoting the non-tween clothing company, The Row, she shares with sister Ashley (like, Lauren Hutton wears it, not Miley Cyrus). Olsen's interview is the typical stuff of celeb profiles: she's totally normal; she doesn't get why you're obsessed with her; she wants to be taken seriously for making out with Ben Kingsley onscreen; blahblahblah. Except, she's clearly not living a normal life at all.

Says the 21-year-old wonder twin who dreams of collecting Basquiats but claims she—sigh—is not rich enough: "Everything I do has to be visually appealing to me. Like when my friend was going away recently I wanted to throw him a surprise party so I filled my entire back yard with Persian rugs, and feather trees, and I put little flowers, deep red roses—black magic roses—all over the grass. Then I put these trees up and birdcages and scattered vintage Playboys on the rugs."

Okay, that doesn't exactly scream normal 21-year-old to us. Where's the Miller Lite, vomit, and Kylie soundtrack? Still, we did have a moment of sympathy for the tiny twin when she said pointed out how annoyed she gets when she sees paparazzi photos of herself with those damn venti Starbucks cups. "How is it relevant that I am getting a coffee in the morning? Most people drink coffee in the morning."

The thing is, MK, most people are not only four venti cups tall and sitting atop an ever-growing mega fortune.