OY! Brooks

When former DHB Industries CEO David Brooks had to choose between spending $10 million of his company's money on manufacturing body armor for American soldiers in Iraq or on a bat mitzvah for his daughter, he went with the obvious choice: Havah Nagila!

Hopefully the bash, which featured Aerosmith, 50 Cent, and Don Henley of the Eagles, was worth it: Brooks has now been hit with 21 counts of alleged securities fraud, insider trading, tax evasion, and obstruction of justice. Most charges stem from the fact that Brooks cashed in $185 million in stock options right before the New York Police Department recalled 6,000 of his company's defective vests. For those keeping track at home, that $10 million spent on crappy music and Manischewitz could have bought 2,857 suits of Interceptor Body Armor. The ones that actually work.

Brooks does have a glimmer of hope: he's retained $750-an-hour defense attorney Joe Tacopino, the subject of a March 2007 GQ profile titled "1-800 Save My Ass". Tacopino also defended the Dutch kid held in the disappearance of Aruba blondie Natalee Holloway, the cop charged with sticking a plunger up Abner Louima's ass, and Foxy Brown.

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