MITT FITS Romney (Photo: Getty Images)
Mitt Romney has fought hard to portray himself as a regular, decent guy, but a new website is giving Mitt a Romnoscopy. One page on romneyfacts.com is dedicated to exposing the former Massachusetts governor's youthful (and middle-aged) brushes with the law. On their own, the misdeeds are probably no worse than the petulant behavior of an average suburban dad, but when taken as a whole, they paint a portrait of a man prone to falling apart when faced with minor inconveniences (especially when he gets around water, or stuck in traffic). Some excerpts after the jump ...

• BLOOMFIELD HILLS, MICH. (1965)—ARREST—CHARGE NOT KNOWN
ROMNEY was arrested along with future wife Ann Davies for actions in connection with practical joke at Cranbrook Academy. Reportedly ROMNEY and several friends "bought huge blocks of ice from the local gas station, laid towels over them, and went sliding down the slopes of a nearby golf course."

• WAYLAND, MASS. (1981)—ARREST—DISORDERLY CONDUCT.
In June 1981, ROMNEY attempted to launch family motorboat at Cochituate State Park despite park ranger advising that he was prohibited from doing so because his boat did not display proper registration. ROMNEY was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct. ROMNEY handcuffed and transported in bathing suit to Natick police station, where released on own recognizance ... Charges were dropped when ROMNEY threatened to sue the state for false arrest.

• POSSIBLE ANIMAL CRUELTY (1983)
In 1983, ROMNEY transported the family Irish setter, SEAMUS, in a dog carrier strapped to the roof of his Chevrolet station wagon during a 12-hour drive from Boston, Mass., to Lake Huron. No complaint was made or charges filed at time. However, Massachusetts law prohibits carrying an animal "in or upon a vehicle, or otherwise, in an unnecessarily cruel or inhuman manner or in a way and manner which might endanger the animal carried thereon."

• HUNTSVILLE, UTAH (2002)—USE OF PROFANITY WITH LAW ENFORCEMENT
On February 10, 2002, while overseeing 2002 Winter Olympics, ROMNEY became extremely angry upon encountering a traffic jam at a venue and proceeded to berate two persons authorized to direct traffic there, including with obscenity laced tirades, according to a police captain at the scene and a volunteer targeted by ROMNEY. The traffic volunteer Shaun Knopp stated that ROMNEY "asked me who the f___ I was and what the f___ I was doing. We got the Olympics going on we don't need this s___ down here." Weber County Sheriff's Office Capt. Terry Shaw, commander of the Snowbasin venue, stated that ROMNEY twice used the F-word while also berating one of his officers, Deputy Kodi Taggart. Capt. Shaw stated that ROMNEY "was abusive" to his officer and advised, unsuccessfully, that "he needs to apologize." ROMNEY denied part of the allegation, insisting he hadn't used the F-word since high school—but admitted he used a word he described as "H-E-double hockey sticks."