SWEAT THE TECHNIQUE McCain (Photos: Getty Images)

In the final days of his imploding candidacy, John McCain has taken a page out of Richard Nixon's play book, finding increasingly bizarre explanations for his political failures. Strangest of all: He reportedly feels his handlers forced him to wear "gay sweaters."

According to one insider, the knit-picking was the crescendo of a tirade by the Arizona senator, in which he blistered aides about the minutiae of the campaign. While many septuagenarians live in a perpetual state of sweater weather, McCain reportedly declared his frustration with being told to don the perceived homosexual outerwear in order to look younger and more approachable.

"He wasn't happy being dictated to. The sweaters were part of that," the source says.

The Mr. Rogers-inspired wardrobe was on its finest display last spring, when the candidate wore a roomy black snuggly while standing under the pounding Iraq sun. Washington insiders wondered why the campaign would place the candidate in such obviously awkward garb.

While it may seem as if the senator is screaming at the rain, one source from a rival campaign explains the real importance of Sweater-gate. "Do those [unflattering] sweaters matter in the grand scheme of things? Probably not. But it's indicative of how [McCain] lost his way. He just allowed himself to be managed into oblivion."

The McCain campaign did not officially respond for comment, but one source that has been close to the senator poses the question most J. Crew shoppers are no doubt asking: "How can a crew-neck sweater make you look gay? They make him look silly, sure. Old, too. But not gay. That's Romney's department."