Victoria Beckham isn't making any friends in Hollywood. Or so says celebrity biographer J. Randy Taraborrelli (author of such classics as Carol Burnett: Laughing Till It Hurts and Michael Jackson: The Magic and the Madness).

In a missive penned for a UK paper, Taraborrelli complains that La Posh has snubbed him not once but three times.

While it's shocking to imagine that a celebrity might shy away from the man who wrote a detailed account of Madonna and Prince's doomed tantric lovemaking, Taraborrelli is miffed. When he approached Mrs. Beckham on Wilshire Boulevard he says he was rebuffed by her security detail and then snipes that onlookers mistook the waistrel for bootylicious J.Lo.

"Victoria Beckham may love America, but America, it seems, is not much in love with Victoria Beckham," he concludes.

And Taraborrelli says that's not the only time he's been snubbed by Posh. A fact, he says, that does not bode well for her fame assault on the U.S.

The meowing doesn't end there. Taraborrelli describes Posh trying to escape him on multiple occasions. "I saw her across the room. The first thing I noticed was her beauty; her features looked as if they were carved from pale, polished marble," he obsesses. "The second thing I noticed was the way her face darkened when I, a mere mortal, walked over to shake her hand to welcome her to the States. She quickly turned from me, leaving me with my hand in the air. I was as intrigued as I was mystified."

Mystified, indeed. Why on earth would a star whose family has been threatened with abduction shy away from a shiny celebrity muckraker? And why all the name-droppy persistence on his part? Perhaps he's working on a Beckham tome.

Photo: Splash News & Picture Agency