WILTING Rose

• Broken Axl: Guns N' Roses, that band that used to matter, proves again that actual Chinese democracy might happen before Axl Rose releases Chinese Democracy.

• Oklahoma, where hypocrisy is a crime: The trial has started for Rev. Lonnie W. Latham, a Baptist minister who had condemned gays as "sinful" and was later arrested for asking an undercover cop for oral sex.

• Emulating his role model: In preparation for his storybook ending, President Bush has brought on a White House lawyer who worked for Richard Nixon.

• Britney loses it, (what it she has left): Paparazzi blog X17Online has exclusive images and video of the balded one sitting in a car at a gas station. Pretty boring until she attacks an SUV and a photographer with an umbrella.

• Enquirer Eager to Prove Aniston a Cokehead
• Psych Expert: Pregnant Smith Looked High on Opiates

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