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Nu, Is Britney Spears Good For The Jews?

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WHITE TRAYF Spears
Britney Spears may not have any Jewish in her, but she seems to want some. The prematurely over-the-hill pop star's latest fella, according to this week's batch of tabloids, is Isaac Cohen, an actor-slash- model from Encino, California. That's "Cohen," as in a member of the priestly lineage descended from Aaron, brother of Moses, leader of the Israelites—by all reasonable estimation, a Jew.

Before turning up on Cohen's arm, Spears was reportedly making time with Jonathan "J.R." Rotem, a producer who's worked with 50 Cent, Destiny's Child, and The Game. Another member of the Hebraic faith, Rotem was born in South Africa to Israeli parents and attended multiple Jewish summer camps as a youngster.

What's going on here? It's true that Spears, a Baptist, has flirted with Judaism in the past, in the form of Kabbalah, a Hollywood brand of mysticism also favored by Madonna and Demi Moore, among others. But she reportedly gave up her Kabbalah studies last June in order to worship her baby.

Maybe the tarnished shiksa goddess is just looking for the proverbial "nice Jewish boy" to treat her right after her failed marriage to trailer trash poster-boy Kevin Federline? Not so fast. According to Ancestry.com, a genealogy website, "Federline" is an Americanized form of the German "Federlein," a German and Ashkenazi Jewish name derived from the German word for feather. A spokeswoman for Federline could not immediately say whether he has Jewish ancestors. In any case, Judaism being a matrilineal religion, little Sean Preston and Jayden James won't have to use a separate set of dairy plates for their Cheetos.

Comments

Maybe she looked at Christina Aguilera's husband and how happy they are together and realized that she needed her own Hebrew stud in her life. It'll never fly though; I've never seen Kosher Cheetos!!

Posted by: VelvetStaccato on January 18, 2007 4:23 PM

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