In a Web exclusive, Newsweek unearths a nine-page Taliban rule book that lays out all of the dos and don'ts of Afghanistan's former (and future?) occupying orthodox Islamist force. It doesn't quite insist that mujahideen must wear 37 pieces of flair, but it's close.

As Christopher Dickey explains, "It speaks volumes about the Taliban: their strategy, their following, their potential virtues, and their persistent vices, and the full text is well worth reading."

That is, if you have the time. We've selected a handful of edicts and offered simple interpretations—full rundown after the jump.

• "The provincial, district, or regional commander in charge is not allowed to sign an individual contract with an NGO [non-governmental organization] or make a deal for money with the NGO. This matter has to be decided by the shura."
Translation: No moonlighting.

• "No person in a position of responsibility is allowed to use jihadi equipment and property for his personal interest."
Translation: The office supply-closet is locked.

• "Every mujahid group is committed to keep watchful guards on duty day and night."
Translation: No gold-bricking.

• "Mujahideen are not allowed to take young boys without beards to the battlefield or to their homes."
Translation: You must be this high to be a warrior. Or, If there's grass on the field, play ball!