FORMER SMOKER Katie Holmes

• Everyone butt Holmes: Is the Bride of Scientology the victim of a backlash? According to a nomination roster on Defamer, virtually everybody connected to the movie Thank You For Smoking has been nominated for an award except for Katie Holmes.

• Ozzy's porn star past: No, not Sharon's Ozzy. It's really the cuter Ozzy from this season's Survivor whose porn past is coming back to haunt—or help—him. Ozzy gives a rather profound, NSFW explanation for his money shot.

• Brokeback Beyoncé: Beyoncé and Eva Longoria might do a lesbian scene for Sophia Coppola's forthcoming Tipping the Velvet (based on Sarah Waters's novel about an 1890s music hall star and her lover). Want a sneak peek? Check out the 2002 TV version. "Tipping the Velvet" already making rounds as a new euphemism.

• Good to have options: Perhaps Britney Spears was a little rash in dispensing with longtime friend/short-time Vegas husband Jason Alexander so quickly. Jason defends the pop princess's honor by dissing Kevin Federline and by proclaiming his love. Now, who's in for a Vegas trip?

• 60 Minutes dissed by POTUS, Glossies War
• Hell Hath No Fury Like an Intern Scorned

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