The reality television star who shot himself in a Californian desert wrote a heartbreaking suicide note to his parents, in which he said: "If life's not enjoyable, why stick around?"

Julien Hug, 35, left the handwritten note for Bertrand and Denise Hug, explaining he was suffering from “severe depression” and felt suicide was the only way out.

"I feel terribly about the grief I've caused," Hug, a one-time contestant on The Bachelorette wrote.

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS: Photo Tribute At Julien Hug's Memorial

"This will hurt you… I'm sorry to have to do this to you... I love you both tremendously."

The restaurateur said: “People will think I took the easy way out. I say I took the smart way out.”

The girlfriend of Julien Hug -- who committed suicide last week -- has revealed how he loathed being asked about the reality television star which made him famous.

A tearful Jennifer Bell told mourners at Hug's funeral at Village Church in Rancho Santa Fe, California, on Friday, how the 35-year-old Bachelorette daredevil was her "life".

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS: Photo Tribute At Julien Hug's Memorial

"He was my life and I don't know what I will do without him," an emotional Bell said.

"He was so incredible, so selfless, he cared about everyone. He loved reading."

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS: Julien & Jennifer Together

Family and friends of the late Julien Hug will celebrate The Bachelorette contestant's life at a public memorial service in California on Friday afternoon.

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS: Julien Hug Throught the Years

Recently, those who knew Hug have remarked on his lust for life, and a friend sent RadarOnline.com these exclusive photos of Hug reuniting with old pals.